Two years ago today I held my mother’s hand as she took her last breathe. Death leaves a vacancy in your life that no one can take up residence in. The loss of my mother did not leave a faint impression like a foot print in the sand that can easily washed away. Her absence has instead felt more like the loss of a limb for a tree. “The … [Read more...]
When Death is Personal & Piercing
Death can make many levels of acquaintance with us. There is some death that is remotely connected to you and gives your heart pause, like distant relatives you never met or celebrities. There is death that hits you full force in the heart. And there is the impact death can make in your life that is everywhere in between. I remember the time … [Read more...]
Your Waves Echo Forever From Yesterday
Sometimes People come in and out of your life Like ocean waves. Sometimes Their lives lap gently up Onto the shores of your life. Sometimes They are powerful rolling waves That inspire you And touch you deeply, And then settle into Gentle consistent waves that comfort you. Sometimes The tide is out And they seem distant, And … [Read more...]
The Lesson of the Carrot, Egg and Coffee Beans
I have been taking a Sunday school class taught by Pastor Tom at our church Pastor Tom on the book of Philippians, which is one of my favorite books of the Bible. Last week to illustrate a point, Pastor Tom shared the story of the carrot, egg and coffee beans. I loved the story and just had to share it with you. What a great lesson and … [Read more...]
Glimpses of Joy
My approach to daily living has been changed by the persistence of grief that has followed the loss of someone so deeply personal to me, that she went down the very roots of who I am. I’ve been through loss before and hard times, but nothing quite like the loss of my mother. It has taken intentional action to catch my equilibrium as I adjust back … [Read more...]
Live or Die :: A Devotional
“Your eyes saw my unformed body. All the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be.” Psalm 139:16 I was standing at the gathering place when I heard my mother calling me home at an unusual hour. Heading towards her I saw something that I didn’t recognize in her countenance. Apprehension consumed me. Her words … [Read more...]
Present at the First & Last Breathe of Life
I’ve been the strong one stroking the belly of a loved one filled with cancer. The cancer so advanced that I could feel it under his thin skin as I promised him that it was okay to die that day, and reassured him that we would carry on. I stood there in the room hours later as the last breath escaped his body relieved that his pain was over and … [Read more...]
Autumn and the Brevity of Life
Autumn always reminds me of the brevity of life. The color of the leaf’s as they change reminds me of the outdoor celebration of life we held a few days after my friend Troy died. Just a few days prior to our celebration of his life, I had passed him in the cafeteria as I rushed out the door. I glanced over at him and every fiber of my body told me … [Read more...]
Upon Goodbye :: My Mom
On January 19, 2011 I picked up my parents from Sea-Tac airport after they cut their Hawaii vacation short because my mom was in severe pain. None of us had any idea that at that moment that within days she would be in the emergency room, then ICU, moved to an oncology unit, in home hospice and gone exactly three weeks later. When I gave … [Read more...]
In Memory :: Grandma Mohs
In the first moments alone with the realization that yesterday my grandmother took her last breath, my clearest memory of her flooded my mind. The image I had was of her outstretched arms reaching to hold my face in her hands. Her face was wide open as if she could engulf me in her smile. A kiss sat ready on her lips as she pulled me towards her … [Read more...]
Alzheimer’s the Kidnapper of History :: In Memory of My Uncle Tom
This morning it seemed that something was different, I could sense it even in the air I breathed, something had changed. I couldn’t get my Uncle Tom off of my mind. He has been dying for some time now, but this week the end was imminent. When my phone rang and my parent’s phone number flashed on the screen, I knew, I knew what was different, Uncle … [Read more...]
