Do you ever sit back and wonder how exactly you got to where you are? Every place (good or bad) I’ve found myself has been from a series of my choices. Once upon a time I suffered from a victim mentality. I felt like a series of life events had put me where I was and were the cause of all my woes. One day I suddenly realized that my own choices played a bigger rule in my heartache than any uncontrollable circumstances. And so I decided to change.
I decided not to be a victim, but a survivor.
I chose to tackle each day as if I was going to be the victor by sunset.
I started to ignore my moods and pay more attention to the next right step to take.
I forgave people whether they asked me to or deserved forgiveness. Most of all I dropped all the burdens of my past at God’s feet. Like many people I was beating myself up with my past mistakes. Every day I still make the conscious decision to not pick my burdens back up to use as a weapon against myself.
When I didn’t feel like getting out of bed, I did it anyway. When I wanted to harbor anger I set the boat on fire and set it free.
Twenty-three years ago I was an active alcoholic, depressed, and suddenly faced with becoming a single parent. I cut ties with the anchors from my past, stopped drinking overnight and chose to become a parent worthy of the life I was then carrying.
The journey from there to here has been long. I’ve won some and lost a lot, but overall I feel victorious. I choose to bath my mind, soothe my heart and rest my soul in the comfort of God’s grace.
Tomorrow is a new day – no matter my mood, energy or what is left in my tank I am going to tackle it as if I will have another historic win by sunset. How about you?
(To learn more about my early life story read Puffy & Blue: The Chronicles of Nine Lives Together)
Donna DeRosa says
That’s the best plan, just take one step in the right direction, and it will lead you to your next steps. I love your positive attitude.
Thanks! One step at a time.
This a great inspiration and I love the message. We all have choices and it is up to us to make changes. Thank you for sharing!
Thanks! Exactly– it us up to us to make necessary changes.
Wise words, Kayla. Taking responsibility ,not only for our choices and actions but also our attitude, is so freeing in the grand scheme of things. Seems like it would be the opposite but when you realize that you do not have to go through life being a victim and decide that you are going to face life head on and be a survivor, it just sets you free from your past, gives you peace for the present and hope for the future. God is so very good!
Indeed – God is good all the time.
Diana Baker says
Thanks for sharing your journey with us. It warmed my heart that you are feeling victorious.
Beautifully written and thank you for sharing your journey with us. I sometimes find it hard to lay things at Jesus’s feet. I tend to pick them up again and have to keep laying them down again. I love your attitude about being victorious by sunset. This post has really encouraged me.
I am glad it was encouraging to me. It does take a conscious decision to leave things at the feet of Jesus or bring them back to leave them again.
“I started to ignore my moods and pay more attention to the next right step to take.”
I think this is my favorite sentence in the world. How wonderful you were able to. I wish more people were. How much better off we all would be.
Beautiful. Courageous. Inspiring. Those are the words that came to mind as I read your post. TY for sharing!!